Another excerpt from my book Make Some Room: Powerful Life Lessons Inspired By an Epic 16-day Colorado River Rafting Trip Through Grand Canyon
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If I were honest, I’d have to say I have a mildly unhealthy addiction to doing three specific things on my smartphone:
- checking Facebook
- taking photos of my cat
- checking the weather
Now, remember that down in the Grand Canyon there is NO cell service. We only had the satellite phone for emergencies. So, I admit it was a true relief during the Canyon trip to not even worry about turning my phone on (in fact, I think I left it with a few other things in the car at the motel). I only missed my phone for taking photos, and instead relied on an old digital camera. That being said, I didn’t take very many pictures regardless, because I was very conscious about just being in the moment, each moment of the trip! And it was fabulous!
Beyond the Canyon
Have you seen the commercial with a dad sitting between his two daughters on a couch? The dad is looking left and right at his daughters, who are both on their phones, thumbs busily texting away. He sighs and says, “You’re texting each other, aren’t you?”
When I gather with people for a meal or attend an event, inevitably I see this “thing” happening. People stare at their little tiny screens and poke them with their thumbs. Other people around us stare at televisions hung on the walls.
I want to scream, “People—put down the phone. Turn off the television!”
Communication suffers. Relationships suffer.
How about we do the old-fashioned thing and talk to the people around us? They matter. So do you.
Are you “ON” all the time?
Catherine Steiner-Adair, a clinical and consulting psychologist at Harvard, recently wrote The Big Disconnect: Protecting Childhood and Family Relationships in the Digital Age. She interviewed more than 1,000 kids (ages four to eighteen). She talked to hundreds of teachers and parents. She noted that children of any age (from the very young to those who were nearly adults) were frustrated by the lack of attention their parents showed them when the parents were looking at any kind of technology and particularly when they were looking at screens (computers, tablets, smartphones).
Here’s a question to ask people in your life: Do you feel like you have to compete with my phone [tablet, computer] for my attention?
If the answer is YES from any of them, it’s time to put down the device and PAY ATTENTION.
Culture of Distraction
(Adapted from a talk by Joe Kraus called “We’re creating a culture of distraction”)
A question to ask yourself: Are you happy with your relationship with your phone/tablet? Do you think it’s a healthy one?
Studies indicate we are:
- increasingly disconnected from the people and events around us
- unable to engage in long-form thinking (These days, we feel anxious when our brains are unstimulated.)
- threatening our own creativity and insight as we fill in our “gap time” with stimulation (“gap time” is a KEY ingredient for creativity and insight and can include “long-form” thinking…see above)
- devaluing real human connection when we prioritize devices (phones, tablets, laptops) over people right in front of us
I read something recently that explained people’s lives were disrupted by noisy factories, trains, and cars in the early 20th century.
When the time clock was introduced into factories, it added a stressful “time” element that hadn’t existed before.
Next came telephones, radio, and televisions. We still have all those things, except now we can hold them in the palms of our hands and carry them everywhere with us.
I sincerely think it was a gift to spend such a long stretch of time away from my smartphone and computer.
During our trip, there were a couple of people who checked the satellite phone daily, mostly because of family needs. Nelson made one call home to check in with his mom. I didn’t think about it or worry about it. Rather, I found great peace in realizing the world will keep turning with or without my input.
It was also a great comfort to sit in groups and talk without being distracted by anything beyond another raft group floating by or a particularly beautiful sunset. I loved the act of connection, being deeply in conversation with people on my trip and feeling heard and being seen.
If reading this gets you interested in joining us for the Main Salmon Slow Down in late August of 2024, click HERE. It’s going to be an AMAZING ADVENTURE!
Warmly,
Angie